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Having been detained, indefinitely, by Eric “My People” Holder’s Civil Rights (for Everyone but Whites) Division of the (Social) Justice Department of these United States of (Post-Racial) America as a “thought criminal” guilty of numerous “hate crimes” (including “Reckless Intolerance,” “Receiving Stolen Privilege,” and “Grand Theft Human Dignity”), and thus having little else to do but whittle shanks and peruse ancient tomes, scrolls, parchments, etc., I am currently reading the 1864 book “Savage Africa: Being the Narrative of a Tour in Equatorial, South-Western, and North-Western Africa” by British historian and explorer William Winwood Reade (1838–1875). What I have found is as funny as it is sad. Truly, when it comes to race relations, nothing ever changes.

From “Savage Africa” (1864)

The subject of Chapter IV, “The Paradise of the Blacks,” is Sierra Leone.

It is one of the chief peculiarities of the Sierra Leone negro that he hates, with an intense and bitter hatred, this white man to whom he owes every thing. [...]

This hatred of the white man becomes really dangerous in a court of justice, when cases of black v. white come before black juries. These men do not want for intelligence; but they form no idea of the sacredness of their calling, and give verdicts at will where their private feelings are concerned. This explains how it is that trial by jury has only been adopted by refined nations. In a savage or semi-civilized state, the heads of the people alone are qualified to judge.

It is a common story here that if you call a black man a nigger you are liable to a fine of five pounds for defamation of character. I do not know if this is really the case, but any thing broader than mere insult is perilous in the extreme. A gentleman who had discharged his servant was annoyed by the man entering his private yard. He ordered him out; the negro was insolent, and refused to go. The white man then did what most Englishmen would have done: he took him by the scruff of the neck and kicked him out. The case was brought before a black jury, who fined him £50.

I had anecdotes of negro jury injustice from so many respectable informants that I could do no less than believe it to be common. I was a little staggered, certainly, when I read in the Rev. J. Leighton Wilson’s work on West Africa the following paragraph:

“But perhaps the most interesting point of view in which the liberated Africans are to be seen, and which will render their moral condition most intelligible to those at a distance, is when they sit at the Quarter Sessions as petty, grand, and special jurors.”

But the following evidence from Sierra Leone, a work written by Mr. Shreeve, who had resided many years in that colony, will prove, I think, that Mr. Wilson’s remark must be intended for irony. Nothing can render their “moral condition more intelligible” than these extracts; though whether it is an “interesting point of view” to those white men whose liberties or fortunes may be at stake, I will leave the reader to judge.

After observing that the negro’s system of physiognomy tends to represent all men bad who happen to be white, and that the white man can not obtain justice in Sierra Leone; after quoting an instance in which a man who had killed another (probably a white victim) was found Not Guilty in spite of all evidence, “a decision at which even the culprit himself appeared astonished, and a virtuous indignation from many ran through the hall,” Mr. Shreeve observes:

“Another reprehensible practice, or rather vice, in which many jurors indulge, is ardent spirits, from which may be traced their frequent, hasty, vociferous, and unjust decisions: this baneful indulgence is evident to all in court; and upon a late trial, at which I was present, a juror was so disorderly that the judge was obliged to impose a fine of £5, and lock the Bacchanalian up till it was paid. Another matter of serious importance, and often fatal to the course of justice, is the common practice of private communication of interested parties with jurors upon their retiring to find a verdict; and again, that of parties being permitted, through the absence or favoritism of the bailiffs, to eavesdrop at the door of the jury-room, and not only to overhear their deliberations, but actually communicate in the native language with those upon whose impartiality at the moment perhaps a life depends.”

Finally he adds, “Here Justice should be painted like Le Brun’s Revenge, with a bowl and dagger, not with the balance and the sword.”

You will perhaps suppose that this dislike for us has proceeded from acts of cruelty and oppression. But no, they have less to complain of in that way than our laboring classes at home. We are their liberators, their shelterers, their protectors — but we are really their masters. They acknowledge our supremacy, but they detest us for it; they do not love the hand which showers gold upon them from above: they prefer the baser metals, which they can grub up from beneath their feet. Paramount in their own paradise, they find themselves pigmies when they stir abroad; the politest words which they receive are tinged with a condescension which goes through them like a sword. Sensitive and vain, they hanker for dominion; possessed of neither patience nor persistence, they can never obtain it save in their own small spheres.

Funny stuff. Well, I’d better wrap things up. It’s almost time for my daily corrective brainwashing session. “Black good! Brown good! White bad!” (They poke you with a pointy stick if you ask about the J*ws.)

See you in Detention Block 7!

Ahoy there, and mind that penguin!

It is a glorious day for sailing, down ’round the magnetic South Pole. Yes, we’re still broadcasting live from the deck of the Hate Submarine.

See her majestic, hateful bow cleave the frigid waters. Feel the deck surge beneath your feet. Taste the salt of the brisk September sea breeze as it’s freezing your face off. Hear the far-off cry of the lonely penguin trapped on an ice floe with the orcas closing in. Smell the gooseberry croissants baking in the oven.

Ahoy again!

Now, I know I promised an important announcement, and rest assured it’s on its way, but it will have to wait, for I must first offer my most sincerest apologies.

Recently it was brought to my attention that certain remarks I made during a debate on school vouchers may have crossed the line into offensive territory. Judge for yourself:

Unaschmoozed: I refuse to listen to your ignorant, useless, stupid, treasonous opinions, you disgusting filth, you Marxist mongrels, you subhuman savages. I hereby call upon all White men, women, and children to arm themselves to the teeth in preparation for the inevitable global race war, in which the blacks, Jews, Mexicans, Gypsies, Eskimos, Chinese, and sundry other lesser breeds of man will unite against the Aryan race and be utterly destroyed by our magnificent, unstoppable army of mechanized Nazi war-dinosaurs and enormously chubby kitties! Huzzah!

I sincerely regret any offense I may have caused with my off-hand remark. The sad truth is, feline obesity, or “chubby kitty syndrome,” is a growing problem in this country.

Unamusement Park’s official Commenter Appreciation Cat (seen here consuming our delicious Commenter Appreciation Pancakes) may be suffering from feline obesity

According to the American Bureau of the Kitty Obesity Research Council (CORK), “over 35% of American domestic kitties are considered to be chubby, including 5% who are considered to be super-chubby… especially their big fat bellies” (CORK Year-End Report, 2011).

sleepy cat in flower pot

This means that more than 1 in 3 kitties in the country suffer from at least one of the symptoms of feline obesity:

  1. getting stuck in the kitty door
  2. can’t jump up on the counter (for noms)
  3. sometimes tip over for no reason (leaving belly susceptible to tickle attacks)

this cat don’t give a fuck

Simply put, America is jam-packed with chubby kitties. They are eating all the treats. Few if any treats remain for the little kitties. We must act quickly and decisively to ensure the uninterrupted flow of treats and thereby avoid a concomitant epidemic of sad little kitties, perhaps by increasing treat production to meet or exceed chubby kitty demand or devising a method for mass kitty dechubbification.

there are kitties in the sink

It is also past time we condemned the use of the derogatory term “roly poly” to refer to those kitties who suffer from feline obesity. According to experts in the field of Civil Rights Linguistics, which is a real thing people study in the universities, the use of this term is exactly equivalent to calling President Obama a wild hairy jungle ape from Kenya who shits on himself and shits on the Constitution and smells of shit and eats his own shit and paws at our social security checks with his shit-stained jungle ape paws while ooking and eeking and making all sorts of other monkey noises and generally being just another louse-infested, AIDS-infected, cotton-picking nigger in need of a good lynching, which I, of course, have never ever said, and never ever will.

here are six cats

Isn’t that right, First Mate?

Gratuitous French Girl/First Mate of ze Hate Submarine: I refuse to associate wif zis nonsense! You are ze very silliest person in ze whole of ze sea. Besides, I ‘ave ze croissants to worry about.

Ze croissants: she ‘as zem to worry about.

Unamused: Ahoy there! Cpt. Unamused here, broadcasting live from the deck of the Hate Submarine, currently on penguin patrol over the magnetic South Pole.

Torpedoes away! Sink that Marxist penguin!

Unamused: Why, you ask? Surely you recall the mysterious flooding of the main Hate Laboratory by several million suspicious gallons of water not two months past, and how I and my petulant yet sultry First Mate were subsequently forced to relocate Central Hate Command (UP-CENT-HAT-COM) to this most hateful of oceanic vessels in order that we might continue plotting a global race war the Park’s various and wholly innocent operations. Ahem.

Gratuitous French Girl: First Mate me reporting for ze duty!

One must always wipe ze delicious chocolates from one’s fingers before reporting for ze duty.

Unamused: There you are, First Mate. How is the investigation into the mysterious flooding coming along?

Gratuitous French Girl: After very careful consideration of ze available facts and clues and red herrings and other fishies, I have decided to blame ze Jews.

Unamused: Well, obviously. Is that all you’ve come up with?

Gratuitous French Girl: I have also invented ten delicious new recipes for croissants. Here zey are: one, strawberry croissant. Two, blueberry croissant. Three, raspberry croissant. Four, blackberry croissant. Five —

Unamused: How about a gooseberry croissant?

Gratuitous French Girl: Eleven! Huzzah! Eleven delicious new recipes for croissants. I shall prepare a batch of ze elusive gooseberry croissants at once.

Unamused: Good, well done. When you’re finished, bring them up to the bridge. I have an important announcement to make.

To be continued…

Courtesy of research by the infamous and sexy M.G., proprietor of the highly innovative and quantitatively and visually oriented HBD/race-realist website Those Who Can See:

I have updated my list of minority violence at school and college with several new entries (we’re up to 24 now), including a screwdriver-wielding English teacher, a screwdriver-wielding Black Alternate History Month enthusiast (much like us, except for the screwdriver), and some feces-throwing apes who somehow got registered as students at a Chicago High School (shrug).

Back to school!

NewsBusters has posted a highly negative review of Chuck Thompson’s remarkable new book, “Better Off without ‘Em: A Northern White Manifesto for Southern Separation Racial Segregation.” Well, you can’t please everybody.

Oh, right: I should remind you that I’ve taken the liberty of diversifying the title for your amusement and edification.

I’ve done the same with the review, which is titled “Author Advocates Letting ‘Mouth-breathing, Racist’ South Blacks Secede.”

Liberals really should decide how they feel about the idea of southern states white people seceding separating from the union black people. The MSNBC crowd suddenly wraps itself in Old Glory a dashiki and rediscovers revises the meaning of “treason” “freedom of association” at the mention of it.

Others, like travel writer Chuck Thompson, wish they’d go. He honestly believes Southern conservatives blacks are standing in the way of progress and solely largely responsible for political gridlock the failure of race relations in contemporary America. The only ‘logical’ way of dealing with it in his mind is secession voluntary segregation. Only then can the Northern states white people have the utopian stable, peaceful society they’re apparently on the verge of attaining losing forever.

Despite being known for more of a tongue-in-cheek style, he couldn’t have been any more serious. So serious in fact, that he wrote a book called “Better Off without ‘Em: A Northern White Manifesto for Southern Secession Racial Segregation.” He promoted it in a recent radio interview with AlterNet’s Joshua Holland.

“We didn’t let the South go ship the emancipated slaves back to Africa when we had the chance. We would have avoided a lot of problems,” Thompson said. “We — meaning this group in the north European-Americans as we might identify ourselves — could take the country we want into a direction that we think is befitting of America without this push and pull dragging down that comes from the Southern states black underclass.”

The problem, he said, is that “dim-witted, mouth-breathing, racist rednecks minorities” represent enormous “voting quorums” in the South gerrymandered districts across the country. Apparently, they get that way by being Christian brainwashed by Progressives, not to mention doomed by genetics. Evangelical Christians Self-proclaimed “civil rights activists” who literally interpret the Bible the harebrained theories of cultural Marxism and adhere to its principles are “lunatics” somehow. “In the South Among minorities with a clear sense of racial consciousness coupled with historical grievances, it’s different, because there is no such thing as compromise racial harmony,” he said. “If it’s God’s law resentment of and malice toward whites that is driving you… then you simply can’t compromise coexist, and that’s where I think a lot of the dysfunction of our political process collapsing civilization comes into play.”

Following that statement, he immediately started rattling off wide-ranging statistics that were supposed to prove how uneducated the population is. “There’s less commitment to the ideal of public any sort of education in the Southern states among blacks than there is in the rest of the country,” he said. “The South black race has the lowest SAT scores, lowest graduation rates, and the most illiteracy.”

Holland was so inspired by the secession segregation idea that he started pressing for more details, wanting to know how the South the races would technically be defined, among other things. “Are we losing Texas the Asians in this deal,” he asked. “Is there any chance we could give them some of the duller more annoying states minorities (like South Dakota the Jews)?”

Despite an earlier declaration that both sides would be better off without one another, Thompson contradicted himself when he refused to relinquish the highly conservative educated state of Texas East Asian minority. “In the end I decided Texas the Asians would stay with the North the whites in large part for economic culinary reasons,” he said. “Texas Chinese food is really one of the economic anchors of this country delicious.”

Holland got even more vicious when he asked what could be done to ‘rescue’ all the Democrats urban whites after secession segregation. “There’s a good chunk of people down there who we would be consigning to basically an English-speaking Mexico a Spanish-speaking Mexico crossed with an Ebonics-speaking Africa,” he said. “Do you just say, here you go, you have to live in a third world country with crappy education systems, no healthcare, and a government of snake handlers snake handlers, witch doctors, cannibals, and much, much more?”

The exchange doesn’t end there, but there’s a lot of back pedaling. Holland, for instance said that he has an affinity for the Southern culture black music and the friendliness of the people. Thompson echoed the sentiment, but the damage had already been done.

Chuck Thompson has written a remarkable new book, “Better Off without ‘Em: A Northern White Manifesto for Southern Separation Racial Segregation.” As you can see, I’ve taken the liberty of diversifying the title for your amusement.

Here’s a synopsis of the book (suitably diversified, of course):

Lets talk about secession segregation.

Not exactly the most suitable cocktail party conversation starter anywhere in the country, but take that notion deep into the heart of Dixie Detroit and you might find yourself running from the possum-hunting conservatives crack-smoking criminals, trailer-park lifers Thug 4 Life’rs, and prayer warriors welfare queens Chuck Thompson encountered during the two years he spent traveling the American South black America asking the question: Would we be better off without em?

The result is a heavily researched, serious inquiry into national divides which is unabashedly controversial, often uproarious, and always thought-provoking. From a church service in Mobile, Alabama Chicago, Illinois, where the gospel entertainer the Reverend Jeremiah Wright announces “Islam is upon us!” “The government lied about inventing the HIV virus as a means of genocide against people of color!” to a store selling Ku Klux Klan “Civil Rights” movement memorabilia on a quaint little street in South Carolina any American city — Thompson lifts the green velvet drapes on a South race that would seem to belong more to the time of Rhett and Scarlett the Stone Age (or, if we’re being extremely generous: the time of Nat Turner and John Brown) than the dawn of the twenty-first century.

By crunching numbers, interviewing experts, and roaming the not-so-former Confederacy growing ghetto, Thompson — an openly disgruntled liberal white man from the Northwest a once-civilized society — makes a compelling case for southern secession voluntary segregation. What would the new nations look like if Virginia governor Bob McDonnell white-hating, race-baiting demagogue Al Sharpton was elected as the first President Tribal Chieftain of the Confederate States of America United States of Black America? If a southern black electorate was left to fend for itself while the North white America did damage control on an auto industry a civilization decimated by cut-rate, union-defying southern voters low-IQ, tribalist black voters for the last hundred years? If the BCS championship football game were replaced by a North vs. South Whites vs. Blacks Coca Cola/ Starbucks Blood Bowl™? If Florida Hispanics and Jews went to the South blacks and Texas Asians to the North whites in the most complex land-and-population grab in American history since the Treaty of Versailles?

“Better Off without Em” is a deliberately provocative book whose insight, humor, fierce and fearless politics race realism, and sheer nerve will spark a national debate that is perhaps long overdue long, long, long, long, long overdue.

SOP for the MOG, if you will.

The leading race realist/immigration reform website, VDARE, is currently featuring my article on Democrat race-baiting (specifically by State Senator L. Louise Lucas of Portsmouth). Check it out, ‘Park rangers (and hate-kittens).

First we watched with dismay as the EEOC charged Pepsi with black and Hispanic criminality “disproportionately” excluding blacks and Hispanics through a policy of “not hiring workers with arrest records.”

Then we gazed in horror as a federal judge fined the FDNY $129 million with black and Hispanic stupidity “intentional discrimination” for testing the intelligence of its recruits.

Now did you really think we’d seen the worst of government-mandated systematic anti-white discrimination (also known as “equality”) and special privileges for non-whites, American or otherwise (also known as “civil rights”)?

It Gets Worse

Straight from the White House:

On Wednesday, during his remarks at the National Urban League conference in New Orleans, LA, President Obama announced he would sign an Executive Order today to improve outcomes and advance educational opportunities for African Americans.

That’s nice. I’d like to improve outcomes and advance opportunities for European Americans. What do you mean, “das raciss, you so raciss”?

The President has made providing a complete and competitive education for all Americans — from cradle to career — a top priority.

trollolol

In the nearly 60 years since the Brown v. Board of Education decision put America on a path toward equal educational opportunity, America’s educational system has undergone a remarkable transformation. Many African American children who attended substandard, segregated schools in the 1950s

… causing those schools to be substandard in the first place…

have grown up to see their children attend integrated and effective elementary and secondary schools, colleges, and universities

… thereby ruining those once-effective elementary and secondary schools, etc.

Nonetheless, substantial obstacles to equal educational opportunity still remain in America’s educational system.

Um… genetics? [ducks]

African American students lack equal access to [blah blah blah], and they disproportionately experience [blah blah blah].

Ohhhh, I see: you meant made-up fake anti-minority discrimination conspiracy theories blaming mythical white “racists” for everyone else’s failure.

The White House Initiative on Educational Excellence for African Americans, housed within the Department of Education, will work with the Executive Office of the President and Cabinet agencies to identify evidence-based best practices to improve African American student achievement in school and college, and to develop a national network of individuals, organizations, and communities that will share and implement these practices. It will also help ensure that Federal programs and initiatives administered by the Department of Education and other Federal agencies maintain a focus on serving and meeting the educational needs of African Americans.

Such as?

To deliver a complete and competitive education for all African Americans, the Initiative will promote, encourage, and undertake efforts designed to meet several objectives, including:

[...]

Promoting a positive school climate that does not rely on methods that result in disparate use of disciplinary tools, and decreasing the disproportionate number of referrals to special education by addressing root causes of the referrals…

That’s straight from the executive order: “… promoting a positive school climate that does not rely on methods that result in disparate use of disciplinary tools…”

If this doesn’t terrify you, you haven’t been paying attention.

Stating the Unspeakably Obvious

Allow me to state the obvious. (Contrary to popular liberal belief, this is not yet punishable by death in the United States.)

Just as everyone knows that black people are more criminal than white people (remember, all the stereotypes are true), everyone also knows that black students in general are at least an order of magnitude more disruptive and dangerous than white students. (You can figure out for yourself where Hispanics and Asians fit in the hierarchy.)

Moreover, we all know — every single one of us — that the reason black-majority (“segregated”) schools are so bad (“substandard”) is because they’re full of black people. I’ve collected a handful of spectacular examples in my list, Minority Violence at School and College, but there are thousands more; start in the AmRen archives.

Unfortunately, although everyone is at least dimly aware of this hilariously inconvenient truth, most people will not admit it. Some will even go to great lengths to pretend it isn’t so. Those people are liars and they should all be lashed in public. Fifty times, I say — but then I’ve always had a soft heart, full of sunshine and kittehs.

See?

Science: Officially “Racist”

Whence these race differences in antisocial behavior (in schools and everywhere else)? Well, we should — but probably don’t — all know by now that those differences are not entirely due to environment (family, society, culture, etc.). They are due in part to genetic differences between the races. This follows from the basic principles of evolutionary biology: mutation, adaptation, etc.

Human populations isolated from one another for tens of thousands of years in wildly different environments (Sweden vs. Somalia, say) will undoubtedly evolve different distributions of key behavioral traits, like intelligence and aggression.

(For more details, see this post, everything after “Race is ancestral geography” in this post, and everything after “Race” in this post.)

That’s the real reason why these “racial disparities in school discipline” aren’t getting any better. Don’t bother with the PC niceties: “racism,” “discrimination,” “prejudice” — all those made-up fake anti-minority discrimination conspiracy theories blaming mythical white “racists” for everyone else’s failure. (Fuck you, Marxist trash. You don’t get to bash white people for succeeding in life.)

In fact, these disparities are not only not improving, they’re actually getting worse, because no one can address them, or even mention them, without being accused of… well, I think we all know. (Hint: it’s the 21st century version of “Heresy! Burn the witch!”)

Now where does this leave us? As I’ve said before:

Race differences in outcomes exist because of race differences in biology. As a result, even if you treat everybody the same, different races will still perform differently.

And that’s why disparate impact does not imply disparate treatment. (Also something I think I’ve mentioned once or twice before…)

Racial Totalitarianism: Past and Present

So why should you be at least a little terrified by this latest bit of anti-white discrimination out of the most divisive administration since Lincoln? Allan Wall nails it in “Should Schools Have Racial Disciplinary Quotas?” (VDARE).

Should schools have racial disciplinary quotas? For example, if a teacher has a class with 50% white students and 50% black students, should the list of students sent to the office or punished in any way also be 50-50?

That looks like what one of Obama’s recent executive orders would lead to.

(Read more at the Daily Caller and at Nicholas Stix, Uncensored.)

It is indeed what Obama’s executive order will lead to. Allan Wall calls this “the ‘cutting edge’ of racial totalitarianism.” He’s right.

Here’s a partial summary of the current state of racial totalitarianism in America with respect to blacks and whites. (You can add the other races yourself.)

  • Blacks are more criminal than whites, so you can’t just hire non-criminals. That would be “racist.”
  • Blacks are less intelligent than whites, so you can’t just hire intelligent non-retarded people. That would be super-”racist.”
  • Black students are more disruptive than white students, so you can’t just discipline the disruptive students. That would be super-mega-”racist.”

Does anyone really believe it stops here?

Racial Totalitarianism… of THE FUTURE

Imagine reading this at whitehouse.gov:

President Obama Signs New Initiative to Improve Judicial Outcomes for African Americans

Executive Order Establishes the White House Initiative on Justice and Liberty for African Americans

On Wednesday, during his remarks at the National Urban League conference in New Orleans, LA, President Obama announced he would sign an Executive Order today to improve judicial outcomes and advance rehabilitation opportunities for African Americans.

The President has made providing a fair and equitable justice system for all Americans a top priority. The White House Initiative on Justice and Liberty for African Americans will work across Federal agencies and with partners and communities nationwide to produce a more effective continuum of criminal penalties and rehabilitation efforts for African American students.

The White House Initiative on Justice and Liberty for African Americans, housed within the Civil Rights Division of the Department of Justice, will work with the Executive Office of the President and Cabinet agencies to identify evidence-based best practices to improve African American judicial outcomes, and to develop a national network of individuals, organizations, and communities that will share and implement these practices. It will also help ensure that Federal programs and initiatives administered by the Department of Justice and other Federal agencies maintain a focus on serving and meeting the judicial needs of African Americans.

To deliver a fair and equitable justice system for all African Americans, the Initiative will promote, encourage, and undertake efforts designed to meet several objectives, including:

  • Promoting a positive social climate that does not rely on methods that result in disparate use of disciplinary tools (including, but not limited to, arrest, prosecution, and incarceration), and decreasing the disproportionate number of arrests and convictions by addressing root causes of the offenses;

(You can imagine how the rest of it would go.)

Six Months Later…

“Excuse me, Officer. I need to report a home invasion. These three black guys with shotguns just kicked in my door and —”

“Whoa, hey, hold on a minute there, pal. ‘Black guys’? Yeah, I’m gonna need you to leave that out of your statement.”

“… Why?”

“Look, man, don’t make this hard for me. Just this past week we’ve had to book thirty of these… ‘young African-American males’.”

“So?”

So, that’s… what, 70 percent of all arrests for the station? You get me? YAAMs only make up —”

“YAAMs?”

Young African-American males only make up, like, six percent of the county. And this week they’re 70 percent of arrests? I’m a white guy, for Chrissakes. Do you know how bad this looks? What happens when the Chief Diversity Officer sees this shit?”

“Um…”

“I gotta turn some of these guys loose. Or lose them. Or something! If I don’t get my YAAM count down before the end of the month, the goddamn ‘Justice and Liberty’ squad is gonna haul me off to a Race-Hate Tribunal. They shoot guys like me, you know — ‘privileged’ white males. Shit, I don’t even have a state-certified Black Best Friend any more.”

“What happened to the last one?”

Shitavious? Man, you know. The usual usual.”

“Stabbed for his EBT card? Shot in a Kool-Aid dispute?”

“Yup.”

“Which one?”

“Both. Shot and stabbed, buying bulk Kool-Aid with his —”

“Okay, okay, I get it.”

“See, I could make up for that, if I only tripled my Social Circle Diversity Index. You’re not half-Cuban or anything, are you? Because we could go see a notary public right now. I’ll give you fifty bucks to say we met in college and —”

“Sorry, I’m not half anything.”

“Shit. Worth a shot. God, I wish I knew more hot Persian girls.”

“Join the club.”

“Yeah, anyway. Gimme a break, will ya? Now, if a Chinese guy breaks into your house, scares your kids, messes up your wife a little, steals some bonsai trees and shit —”

“Then you’ll be all over it?”

“I’ll bust some heads.”

“What if he’s a Chinese Jew?”

“… Don’t even joke about that shit.”

Far-fetched?

I give it five years.

The Camp of the Saints

The Camp of the Saints (1973), by Jean Raspail, is an important book about race, immigration, and the future of white people and Western Civilization. Every reactionary should read it.

Luckily for you, reactionary friends, it is also exciting, suspenseful, funny, and thoroughly entertaining. I finished it in one day.

Think of The Camp of the Saints as a much shorter, much funnier Atlas Shrugged with the economic Marxists (Communists) replaced by racial/cultural Marxists, i.e., “Progressives” (who are also, incidentally, Communists).

And yes, it’s funny. I was laughing out loud by the time Dom Meichior called on Saint Podiatron for his assistance, but the Christening scene — never mind, just read the damn book!

On a scale of one to five kittehs, I give The Camp of the Saints… five kittehs!

So many.

A PDF version may be found here, but you can also purchase it on Amazon.

As you can see, I have changed the look of Unamusement Park, because I just discovered nydwracu’s blog and it’s so f*#$ing sexy, I just had to rip it off.

Muahahahahaaa!

cats going beep beep

Take that!

Also, his latest post is quite good.

Update: Unamusement Park look reverted, almost immediately, to original.

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