Dr. Park: Oh hi there! Come in, please. Here, put on this lab coat and protective eyewear.

Welcome — to Unamusement Park’s Center for Research On Craziness Occasioned by Pointed Observations of a Racial Nature and Its Practical Uses and Benefits: the newly operational C.R.O.C.O.P.O.R.N.I.P.U.B., funded by your generous donations to the Carlyle Club and bearing no relation whatsoever to the erotic herpetology drinking establishment “Croco-Porno-Pub,” which is sixty miles west of here along Route 302 and should never under any circumstances be visited by any persons, for any reason, living or dead.

This is where top ‘Park scientists study just how crazy they can drive otherwise quite reasonable people simply by stating politically inconvenient (“incorrect”) facts.

On your left you can see the Trayvon Testing Range, which — obviously — we’ve filled with Skittles and “white”-Hispanic Neighborhood Watch volunteers.

[Automatic gunfire.]

What’s that? Yes, a volatile combination indeed! Well spotted. And on your right you’ll see the Simulated Social Sciences Department, where the boys down in R&D have got us fixed up with no less than six life-size models of early 21st century American social science professors for us to work on. Of course, we’ll be staying back here, at a safe distance, — yes, you’ll want to keep those goggles on, ma’am, — but trained professionals from our own private paramilitary force are hard at work delivering our custom-crafted lines at close range. Let’s listen in:

Maj. von Braun (in Blackface): [Clears throat.] Say, uh, “Professor”… hi, I’m in your… anthropology class. Could you, uh, help me with this homework?

Professor-Bot Mk. IV: Why. Yes. Of course: Ethnic. Minority. Student. What. Seems to be? The trouble.

Maj. von Braun (in Blackface): I’m supposed to be proving that the justice system is biased against minorities. (Do I really have to say this?)

Hate Technician: Just read the script, please, Major.

Maj. von Braun (in Blackface): Minorities like me. An African-American Hispanic transgender lesbian. With… with a lithp. Suscep — thutheptible to thtereotype threatth. However, all the evidenthe thuggestths that dithproportionate imprithonment ith due to dithproportionate offending rateth.

Professor-Bot Mk. IV: Well: Ethnic. Minority. Student. That sounds like. Racial. Discrimination. Do you need me. To file? A hate crime report.

Maj. von Braun (in Blackface): Oh but profethor I do not understand how facts can be “rathist,” won’t you please take a look at these statistics I have downloaded from Unamuthement Park.

Hate Technician: Major, I’m picking up some unusual readings on this end — but that might have something to do with the lithp — I mean lisp.

Professor-Bot Mk. IV: Race — statistics — Ethnic. Minority. Student. — social construct — error — legacy of slavery — Ethnic. Minority. — pri-vi-lege — error — systemic racism — Holocaust — warning: system shutdown —

Hate Technician: Prepare to evacuate simulated classroom environment in 3, 2, —

Maj. von Braun (in Blackface): Ah, thcrew it —

[Automatic gunfire.]

Dr. Park: Splendid! What? Yes, that’s perfectly normal. We go through about four Professor-Bots a day. Better than shooting real social science professors, right kids?

[Huge wink.]

Let’s move along, shall we?

Ah, here we see one of our Junior ‘Park Rangers, Hate Cadet unj, conducting a little experiment of his own: electronically posting — or electro-posting — the ‘Park’s excellent race/crime flyer to a popular World Wide Web opinion aggregation center!

What did you learn from your experiment, Hate Cadet?

Hate Cadet unj: I have learned many things. Here, they are on this… poster board I have prepared:

  1. Anyone who says “black people are more criminal than white people” is a “racist” because that is a “racist” “lie.”
  2. Everyone already knows that black people are more criminal than white people, so the only reason to state this commonplace truth is that you are a “racist.”
  3. Anyone who says “black people are more criminal than white people” and then immediately calls someone else a “racist” for saying the same thing is exempt from being called a “racist.”
  4. Classifying people as white or black for the purpose of calculating crime rates is “racist.”
  5. Classifying people as white or black for the purpose of calculating poverty rates is the opposite of “racist.”
  6. It is “racist” to assert that numbers like 13 and 4.6 are “way higher” than “only” 2.7.
  7. If you say something that is similar to some other, never explicitly stated thing, which — you are told — has been said before on Free Republic, then what you said is “racist.”
  8. In spite or perhaps because of Findings 1 through 7, “racist” is still a meaningful word with a real definition that can and should be used to shut down any and all discussions of race that stray from blaming everything bad in human history on white people, if indeed they deserve to be called people.
  9. Black people can do literally anything, at any time, for any reason or no reason at all, and it is either (a) bad, and therefore caused by slavery, or (b) not so bad, and therefore proof that black people have never done anything bad ever.
  10. The typical criminal in 21st century America is a rascally bread-pilfering urchin out of a Charles Dickens book or perhaps Les Misérables, except slightly more pathetically angelic on account of being black.
  11. The best way to understand race relations in contemporary American society is to believe everything a black academic says, unless it’s Thomas Sowell or Walter Williams.
  12. The best way to understand race relations in contemporary American society is to live in the suburbs surrounded by white people.
  13. The best way to understand race relations in contemporary American society is to scream “Racist!” as loud as you can, hoping to fit in.
  14. When someone says something which is arguably or even plainly true, “Simply wrong” is a sufficient rebuttal. “Straw man” or “Non-sequitur” will also suffice.
  15. A phrase like “logically correct in the assumptions it makes in its data” is totally meaningful and definitely not just a hash of vaguely intelligent-sounding words thrown together to make the author sound smart to lazy, careless and/or dim-witted readers.
  16. Words like “logic,” “assumption,” “data,” “bias,” “factual,” “statistic,” “misleading” and “socio-economic” can pretty much be inserted into a sentence at random, making that sentence 80 to 100 percent more convincing to lazy, careless and/or dim-witted readers, and this is entirely intellectually honest.
  17. Despite the alleged existence of African albinos and non-Hispanic Arabs, “race” is logically, semantically and biologically equivalent to skin color.
  18. Your skin color cannot make you more criminal, but it can make you more “racist.”
  19. Black people are not more criminal than white people.
  20. Black people are obviously more criminal than white people.
  21. The notion that black people could be more criminal than white people is so preposterous and bizarre that anyone who says it must be insane or evil.
  22. Black people are identical to white people and therefore, logically speaking, must have an identical crime rate.
  23. Black people are identical to white people except that white people are “racist” and therefore, ethically speaking, black people are entitled to be more criminal, which they either (a) are, (b) aren’t, (c) “Racist!” or (d) all of the above.
  24. If the conclusion upsets you, you don’t have to look at the data if you don’t feel like it. After all, it’s probably “racist.”
  25. If the conclusion upsets you, you must never look at the data. After all, etc.
  26. If you don’t understand how to get from the raw data to the conclusion, you don’t have to ask, because the problem isn’t you; it’s “racism.”
  27. If you don’t understand how to get from the raw data to the conclusion, you must never ask, because etc.
  28. Poverty causes rape. Unemployment causes arson.
  29. Slavery causes rape. Segregation causes arson.
  30. When in doubt, shout “racist” and run. This rule supersedes all other rules.

Dr. Park: So there you have it. We learned several interesting things today.


We’re running a fundraiser over at Radish. Please check it out.

In honor of star witness and 19-year-old non-high school graduate Rachel “That’s Real Retarded, Sir” Jeantel and her free ride to college, I present to you an updated version of the classic Unamusement Park race/IQ flyer.

Race and IQ flyer

Three columns for ease of reading. (You print it sideways.)

Click the pic for the glorious full-size version. PDF file here.

Now go do something suitably hateful with it. Personally, I’ll be on the state college campus tomorrow morning, sticking ‘em in every book on “social justice” I can find. How about you?

I thought it might be nice to have an updated version of the classic Unamusement Park race/crime flyer.

Race and crime flyer

Three columns for ease of reading. (You print it sideways.)

Click the pic for the glorious full-size version. PDF file here.

Not Guilty

I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day

When it’s cold outside, I’ve got the month of May

I guess you’d say

What can make me feel this way?

Well, there’s a spot of sunshine on a cloudy day.

And we still are.

And we still are.

Now for the riots

(But don’t worry: they’re only Mexicans.)

So I see “immigration” is in the news again. A lot. Really a lot. Enough, even, to rouse me from my lengthy slumber (yawn). So excuse me if I seem like a sleepy kitteh. I’m actually still in my pajamas, here at Central Hate Command (CENT-HAT-COM), but the Gratuitous French Girl is making coffee (French roast, naturally, in her delightful Iron Cross-print nightie), so I’ll soon be up to speed, or at the very least fully conscious.

‘Immigration bill to bring in at least 33 million people, says group’ (The Daily Caller):

The pending Senate immigration [sic] bill would bring a minimum of 33 million people into the country during its first decade of operation, according to an analysis by NumbersUSA, a group that wants to slow the current immigration [sic] rate.

By 2024, the inflow would include an estimated 9.2 million illegal immigrants [sic], plus 2.5 million illegals [sic] who arrived as children — dubbed ‘Dreamers’ — plus roughly 3.4 million company-sponsored employees with university degrees, said the unreleased analysis.

The majority of the inflow, or roughly 17 million people, would consist of family members of illegals, recent immigrants [sic] and of company-sponsored workers, according to the NumbersUSA analysis provided to The Daily Caller.

I actually don’t have a problem with immigration, because immigration per se isn’t a problem. By all means, let in the Germans, the French, the Afrikaners and the Dutch. Particularly the Afrikaners.

No, my problem is entirely with colonization, i.e., — and I must be comically blunt here, because someone’s got to say it, — millions of Third World non-whites invading formerly white countries and bringing all their Third World problems with them, problems which include their present and future children, because human behavioral traits like intelligence and criminality are heritable. That, plus the fact that we’re calling colonization “immigration” (and have apparently forgotten what “Orwellian” means). Both of these things are problematic indeed.

Still, there may be a silver lining of sorts. ‘Immigration reform could be bonanza for Democrats’ (Politico):

The immigration proposal pending in Congress would transform the nation’s political landscape for a generation or more — pumping as many as 11 million new Hispanic voters into the electorate a decade from now in ways that, if current trends hold, would produce an electoral bonanza for Democrats and cripple Republican prospects in many states they now win easily.

Beneath the philosophical [lololol — but seriously, the rope for all of them] debates about amnesty and border security, there are brass-tacks partisan calculations driving the thinking of lawmakers in both parties over comprehensive immigration reform, which in its current form offers a pathway to citizenship — and full voting rights — for a group of undocumented residents that roughly equals the population of Ohio, the nation’s seventh-largest state.

When America’s Red Staters, the so-called country class, understand that the Republican Party, which has so thoroughly and repeatedly betrayed them, is finally and forever dead, there will be room in American politics for something better.

Could it be this? Or this? Or maybe even this? Who knows!

Whatever it is, don’t call it a Revolution. Call it a Reaction.

Radish, home of the thief-kitty and possibly the fascist ferret, has a new issue celebrating Black Alternate History Month. I demand that NO ONE read it here.

Radish has a new issue on Jean Raspail’s prophetic novel The Camp of the Saints. I suggest NO ONE read it here, because they are thief-kitties.

As you may be aware, one year ago, I announced that Unamusement Park would cease to exist in its current format — that it would switch to a print publication by the awesome name of Radish.

Today, I am horrified to report that someone, some SECRET ORGANIZATION, possibly in collusion with a sneaky kitty, has stoled’ed my awesome idea (which I only failed to act on for 361 days because I was busy with a thing and then another thing), and taken it and put it here where I cannot retrieve it.

Why, oh why is this happening to me???

This THIEFERY is so discouraging that I just may have to quit blogging. I suppose you will have to visit this THIEF’s website from now on. I hope you are happy, UNKNOWN THIEF-KITTY ORGANIZATION. You have stoled’ed my dreams, and probably nom’ed them, like so many Treats.


Race and education are in the news again. No, not the nationwide racial violence and general mayhem caused by non-Asian minority (NAM) students. Just another made-up conspiracy theory blaming mythical white “racists” for everyone else’s failure.

From the Washington Post:

The disproportionately low number of black and Latino students admitted to Fairfax County’s prestigious Thomas Jefferson High School for Science and Technology — long a subject of debate — has triggered a federal civil rights complaint.


The complaint alleges that black and Latino students, as well as students with disabilities, are being shut out of Thomas Jefferson long before they apply in eighth grade because of Fairfax County Public Schools’ systematic failure to identify them for gifted education programs that begin in elementary school.


Together, black and Latino students account for about 4 percent of the 480 students admitted to next year’s freshman class at Thomas Jefferson, or TJ. The two groups make up 32 percent of the county’s student population.


The complaint also faults the TJ admissions process itself for putting some students at a disadvantage.

One example, the complaint says, is the “student information sheet” used to assess a teen’s motivation and commitment to math and science education. A question asks students to “Describe in detail your most important out-of-school or after-school activity or interest.”

“For many black and Latino students, especially those from lower socioeconomic backgrounds,” the complaint says, “their most significant after school activity may well be babysitting their younger siblings while their parents work.”

Sure, they could be “babysitting their younger siblings while their parents work.” Or selling drugs while their parents collect welfare checks. Or vice versa. Or whatever.

Interestingly, the complaint chose not to emphasize (and the Post chose not to even mention) that Asians make up 20 percent of the county’s student population, but 64.2 percent of next year’s freshman class at TJ.

Indeed, Jared Taylor has calculated (from the figures cited in the complaint) that “whites are 4.8 times more likely than Hispanics to be admitted to TJ, and are 4.2 times more likely than blacks. Asians, however, are 5.4 times more likely than whites to be admitted” — bringing the standard “white privilege” narrative to a screeching halt. Those pesky Asians!

Of course, the complaint — filed with the Department of Education by the Fairfax chapter of the NAACP (National Association of We’re Black So Give Us Free Goodies or We’ll Burn Your Cities Down) and the “Coalition of The Silence,” a bizarrely named “advocacy group led by former county school board member Tina Hone” — is nothing more than the usual NAM griping based on what I call the fundamental fallacy of race relations (which happens to also be a typically insane Supreme Court ruling): that “disparate impact” (i.e., that NAMs fail, always and everywhere) somehow implies “disparate treatment” (i.e., white people are evil, die white man die, quick steal his shoes).

The reasoning is invalid because, of course, contrary to Marxist theory, the races of man were not created equal. Of course, if white people were allowed to notice that, white guilt would fade away and the handouts would dry up. It is therefore essential to our radical, anti-white elites that reality be ruled inadmissible and facts reclassified as “hate speech” on the compelling grounds of das racis’, you racis’, e’rybody racis’ all up in he’e:

“Look at any study of giftedness. It is equally distributed across humanity. God did not change that rule when he got to Fairfax County,” says former school board member Tina Hone.

To which one can only reply: Just how f*&%$#@ stupid are you, Miss Hone? One really would like to know.

Because if one actually took this fruitcake’s advice and looked at any study of giftedness, any study at all (e.g., Chuck’s illuminating graph from Gifted Child Quarterly), one would discover that high intelligence is about as far from being “equally distributed across humanity” as a crackhead is from winning a Fields Medal — though of course one cannot discount the possibility of a Nobel Peace Prize.

As the reader is no doubt well aware (zzz), race differences in intelligence guarantee that in any large population (e.g., the school-age children of Fairfax County), above any given threshold of intelligence (e.g., giftedness, often defined as an IQ of 130), there will be proportionally more Asians than whites, and more whites than either Hispanics or blacks. This hate-fact — the existence of so-called IQ gaps — is not in dispute (indeed, it is perfectly obvious from the state of our planet, now and at any other point in recorded history), and neither is our ability to reliably measure intelligence with IQ tests.

But as I say, in the interests of maintaining the “diversity racket” (i.e., free goodies for whiny minorities set to an endless chorus of kill whitey and take his stuff yo), such hateful hatred must be ushered into the gas chambers of political correctness.

I’m sorry, that was offensive. I meant to say the alleged gas chambers.

Since the perpetrators of that never-ending scam (“reparations,” “affirmative action,” “Civil Rights,” “End Apartheid,” etc., etc.), namely the cultural Marxists (or Progressives as they’ve styled themselves of late), are in charge of the government, the media, and the education system (three sides to the same polygon), egalitarian nonsense of the Tina Hone “Look at Any Study!!!” school is ubiquitous in all three.

Choosing an example at random, iGifted School, the well staffed “Online Debate & Math Club For Gifted Students,” declares:

Modern research indicates that the gifted are equally distributed among all races, sexes and economic segments of society.

At once, without so much as a glance at the “modern research,” we know this is wrong. “All economic segments of society”? If intelligence is heritable at all (it’s quite heritable, as every parent ought to know) and correlates at all with income (it correlates quite well with both income and educational attainment, as every college graduate ought to know), then giftedness will not be equally distributed “among all economic segments of society,” which indeed it isn’t. It is also, of course, not “equally distributed among all races.”

The National Opportunity to Learn Campaign proclaims:

Identification of gifted and talented students is comparative within similar age groups, experience and environments, that is, every group of students — rich, poor, Black, White, those with highly educated parents, those whose parents are not highly educated — should have approximately equal proportions of gifted and talented students.

“Identification… is comparative”? I’m fairly certain that doesn’t actually mean anything. I have already noted that “those with highly educated parents” will have a higher proportion of gifted students than “those whose parents are not highly educated” — whether they “should” or not — because intelligence is heritable and correlates with educational attainment.

TeachingExpertise.com insists:

Ability is evenly distributed within the population; achievement is not.

“Progressives” don’t just believe demonstrably false claims — like giftedness is equally distributed across humanity, let alone any study will show you that giftedness is equally distributed across humanity — that can be debunked in under a minute by anyone with a working Internet connection. They have actually built their entire belief system/political ideology/mass psychosis upon that stinking heap of garbage. The Left has made axioms of fairy tales.

Dick Kantenberger (“Education, Giftedness, Gifted and Talented Education, Senior Issues”) hallucinates (together with EducationNews.org):

it has been known for over 200 years that potential giftedness is equally distributed among all races and cultures.

I must admit I was unable to imagine how even a Marxist education theorist (redundant, I know) could convince himself that this particular falsehood “has been known for over 200 years,” until I read this by the same author:

If we do not want to believe what Thomas Jefferson wrote about this (see part 2) in 1772, the modern research indicates that the gifted are equally distributed among all races, sexes and economic segments of society.

Oh, I see. It is because “we do not want to believe what Thomas Jefferson” — a WHITE MAN who had SLAVES and HATED WOMEN and is from THE SAME RACE AS HITLER — wrote about giftedness (?) in 1772, which was indeed over 200 years ago.

I leave it to the reader to wade through “Race, Class, and Whiteness in Gifted and Talented Identification: A Case Study” (Berkeley Review of Education), by far the most sophisticated and therefore infuriating and depressing example I have found of a stupid theory about smart kids. It so takes for granted its impossible assumptions about race and intelligence, it doesn’t bother even to state them.

No, on second thought, I take that back: a brief excerpt should suffice for even the most masochistic of readers.

Our critique of these practices is based on Cheryl Harris’ (1993) argument that in the American legal system, and broadly in the culture, “whiteness” is a form of property that perpetuates inequality [...] dating back to the ownership of persons as slaves and the usurpation of Native American land rights. [...]

Harris (1993) argues that because of their “racial and cultural otherness,” Native Americans and blacks were unable to assert rights in land and their very selves (p. 1721). [...]

Returning to the origin of white property rights, Harris (1993) points out that whites profited from the labor of slaves and the use of land that was not theirs. Similarly, a disproportionate number of white students identified as “gifted” claim educational opportunities mandated by law and paid for by state funds.

Translation: “Die, white man. Just f*&%$#@ die” (Harris, 1993).


It is worth pointing out that nine years ago, on the basis of racist white supremacist Nazi trickery, also known as statistics, a law professor, Lloyd Cohen, “filed a federal civil rights complaint alleging racial discrimination in admissions”:

Cohen contended that it was white students who were losing out, the deck stacked against them as the school system sought to boost black enrollment at the high-flying school.


Cohen’s complaint was distilled from a long article he wrote in 2003 for the Albany Law Review, in which he used statistical tools and other information to analyze TJ admissions decisions made in 2002.

That year, 11 black students made it into a pool of about 800 semifinalists based on the strength of their grades and scores on a math admissions test. Ten of them — including some who scored lower than white students who were rejected — were admitted after teacher recommendations and essays were considered.

According to Cohen’s analysis, black students were substantially more likely to be admitted than white students with similar credentials. Hispanic and Asian students also had an advantage over their white counterparts, he wrote, although a smaller one.

“The true purpose of the current admissions regime is to engage in invidious racial discrimination,” Cohen wrote.

Well, never mind that. Don’t you know there are white students profiting from the labors of gifted black slaves and stealing all the land from genius Indians?

… Or something.

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